State seeks applicants for conservation warden training program
MADISON - The Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources is looking for a few good men and women.
The DNR is once again (proof that it never ends) recruiting conservation wardens. The current recruiting period will run through June 16 (I guess on June 17 it must self-destruct).
The DNR is planning to hire 10 new conservation wardens in the effort to fill existing and anticipated (another term for wants ) vacancies in the state's warden force.
"Many of our veteran wardens are at or nearing retirement," (that means many more that we can not afford and who are living off of our backs with plush retirement benefits) says Darrel Waldera, training director for the DNR Bureau of Law Enforcement (another word for communist, dictatorship). "By the end of 2007 there will be approximately 31 warden vacancies (Good, Finally!) throughout the state. Within the next two years we'll be working hard to fill as many of those vacancies as possible (That's too bad)."
With the department's budget finalized for this year (that's another way of stating they packed it full of pork), Chief DNR Warden Randy Stark says he is "pleased we'll be able to continue filling our vacant warden positions."
"It's important to start the hiring process now (because on June 17 they self-destruct) so we have new wardens ready to place in communities (fog horn) around the state at the end of 2007 when the recruits complete their first year of training," Stark says.
"We have a lot of important work to do in the next couple of years recruiting, hiring and training quality candidates (quality candidates must mean thugs who will not need a court system to do what ever they want to). They'll be the next generation of wardens charged with providing public safety (making up their own rules as they go along) and protecting Wisconsin's natural resources (fining anything that moves, actually even fining things that don't move)."
Well qualifed candidates must meet high DNR and state standards (Thugs without a court system who make up their own laws), pass physical and psychological testing (can you ruthlessly harrass someone for absolutely no reason at all?) and undergo a thorough background investigation (do you treat your friends and family like crap?; if you do we want you).
"We need dedicated (willing to turn an average citizen into a felon because you said so), caring (enough to make sure no kid will want to hunt, fish, or own land when your through with them)and intelligent (Is your IQ over 5?)men and women," according to DNR regional warden Barbara Wolf.
At a minimum, applicants must have an Associates degree or at least 60 academic credits (Freshman Year Inititiative will also count) and be at least 21 years old by their date of hire, which will be January 2, 2007 for this new recruit warden class.
Besides the educational requirements, an interest in protecting people (turning them into criminals by invading their very own private property and telling them what is good for them) and natural resources (everything is governed by mother earth!), and clearing a background check, candidates must also have personal and communication skills (Use a billy club to communicate) needed to work with a wide variety of people from various cultures who use natural resources in a changing (another code word for someone who wants to be left alone on their own property) society.
"Much of a warden's day-to-day work," says Wolf, puts him or her in contact with people (there's the billy club again).
"We need people who are forward-thinking (can you walk onto someone's property with binoculars and sit all day to see if they will break one of your hundred thousand worthless rules?), who can resolve conflict (arrest them and turn them into criminals), solve problems (save a walnut tree from someone putting tree steps in it) and build community (fog horn) relationships to carry out this mission (speechless on this one)," she added.
More information about the Wisconsin Conservation Warden service can be found on the DNR law enforcement Web pages.
Application and examination materials will be available online from May 22 through June 16, 2006 on the employment section of the DNR Web site, www.dnr.state.wi.us
For people without computers the DNR suggests they visit local public libraries (new one coming soon near you!) or Job Service offices (another government facility paid for by the public) to access the examination through computers. The examination must be completed by June 16, 2006.
Individuals with questions about the hiring process should contact Marilyn Howell at the DNR Bureau of Law Enforcement by email at email@example.com or call 608-266-2174.
Citizen Joe @ OnTheBorderLine