Jackass Becomes a Dad: the Movie
In case you missed the news from the tiny Wisconsin town of Oregon*:
You know the rest - dad goes to jail, has hilarious bonding experiences with prisoners helping to release their inner Jackass, then the wife finds out the truth: that the injury was only the size of a dime, that dad humorously aimed for the padded pocket, and that their son's evil third grade teacher - who hates dad but secretly has a wierd, stalkeresque thing for him - actually wrote the essay that helped send dad up.
Spoiler alert! Dad is freed, the scary hag of a teacher is fired, and they all live happily ever after. Or at least after dad finishes anger management counseling.
*Oregon is a tiny backwater town a stone's throw from the capital. Where everybody is a redneck farm type. Or professor at UW. Or lawyer, lobbyest, dentist, software designer, esthetician - all your basic Wisconsin red neck varieties. Seriously. There's probably a crack house behind the roundabout closest to the highway, I think a stringer for the Journal Sentinel lives there, and rumor has it that a bunch of Racine gangstas cruised through once.
...Peschl said he was trying to watch TV in his home in the southern Wisconsin town of Oregon but the boy was blocking his view and didn't move out of the way when asked to do so.
Peschl said he happened to be holding a BB gun, and he aimed at his son's left rear pocket because he thought that would be more padded, the complaint said.
You know the rest - dad goes to jail, has hilarious bonding experiences with prisoners helping to release their inner Jackass, then the wife finds out the truth: that the injury was only the size of a dime, that dad humorously aimed for the padded pocket, and that their son's evil third grade teacher - who hates dad but secretly has a wierd, stalkeresque thing for him - actually wrote the essay that helped send dad up.
Spoiler alert! Dad is freed, the scary hag of a teacher is fired, and they all live happily ever after. Or at least after dad finishes anger management counseling.
*Oregon is a tiny backwater town a stone's throw from the capital. Where everybody is a redneck farm type. Or professor at UW. Or lawyer, lobbyest, dentist, software designer, esthetician - all your basic Wisconsin red neck varieties. Seriously. There's probably a crack house behind the roundabout closest to the highway, I think a stringer for the Journal Sentinel lives there, and rumor has it that a bunch of Racine gangstas cruised through once.
posted by Jane Bellwether @ 1:43 PM
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