Danica Patrick!

Okay, I’ve got it all figured out. The way I see it, we have three options for rushing in and seizing power while the guys at NRO are away.

1. A quick but violent and bloody coup followed by vicious infighting and decades of political instability. I’m not really endorsing this option.

2. Also known as “The Jib Doctrine,” we simply repeat the name “Danica Patrick” over and over and over again, with links to her picture whenever possible. .

3. This is the one I really like: all we need is a crowbar, at least one laptop with wireless capability (a good one, preferably), several stocking masks and/or plastic eggs with pantyhose in them, flashlights, screwdrivers, a French-Hungarian dictionary, either a charter plane or a dozen tickets (first class, natch) to New York, a trans-quadraplennial transmogrifying distributor with 2.367 Hzp/Mg acceleration capability, and a spoon. So far, I’ve got the spoon.

Who's in?

UPDATE:


Deploy the trans-quadraplennial transmogrifying distributor! Deploy! Deploy! Deploy!

Update (~ed)
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